Friendship Skills
Photo by Mario Alberto Magallanes Trejo
Just like learning reading, writing, and math children must sometimes learn the art of making friends. Making friends is a complex social skill which can take lots of practice. The main friendship making skills according to Elaine K. McEwan are:
Conversational Skills
- Meeting New People
- Introducing two people who don’t know each other
- Starting a conversation (entering a group)
- Listening to a conversation
- Keeping a conversation going
- Waiting your turn to say something
- Ending a conversation
Skills for Interacting with Peers
- Sharing
- Compromising
- Handling being teased
- Saying No
- Joining a group
- Letting people know what you think and believe even with disagreement
- Handling peer pressure
- Giving a compliment
- Accepting a compliment
- Apologizing
- Playing group game or activity
- Handle being left out
- Handing someone asking you to do something you cant because you don’t know how
- Seeking Help from Peers
- Asking a question
- Saying Thank You
- Keeping a secret
- Disagreeing
Skills for Controlling Emotions
- Identifying and expressing emotions
- Handling other peoples anger
- Handling your own anger
- Handling other people’s failure
- Handing your own failure
- Handing losing
- Expressing affection
- Dealing fear
- Rewarding yourself
- Using self-control
- Handing embarrassment
- Accepting no
Consider these skills when talking to your child about making friends. Explain, model, and practice the skill together. Once you feel they have a good grasp on the concept encourage them to go into the "real world" and give it a shot! Be sure to debrief with them afterwards and offer specific advice to help them hone this skill set.